All posts tagged: rant

Raising a helplessly weak generation

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When I say weak, I’m not talking about physically weak but weak in character. I was sitting at a lunch, joking around with my friend’s 9-year-old daughter who had a wiggly tooth. I stated that I could get her more money quickly if she really wanted to add to her candy drawer. With excitement she asked me how. I told her I’d tie her tooth to a door or a car and quickly pop it out. I assured her she wouldn’t feel a thing and that I did that once as a kid. She cried, I got in trouble for the conversation. This isn’t the first time I’ve said that to a kid with them almost in tears or actually in tears. There have been other children, younger actually who thought that concept is great because for a second of inconvenience they saw that the return was worth it. Anyways, my first point Why are we creating a world that is terrifying to children. We’ve created a world where children are afraid of everything. No …

The passengers guide to proper airplane etiquette

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Last October while traveling to New Zealand from Los Angeles I had an interesting run in with a fellow passenger on my flight who was, lets just say, less than becoming… Which inspired me to gather some information from fellow travelers and friends, about their experiences with the less than becoming airplane neighbor. I’ve been putting it off for awhile now, then low and behold my late night comedian crush Jimmy Kimmel releases a mini skit re-enacting many of these moments we all agree are the absolute worst, taken from a poll Expedia created on “the most annoying types of airline passengers” (See video below article) Without going into further detail about the video, I have listed my findings on what proper airplane etiquette is to being a good neighbor during your flight. Personal hygiene You’re sharing personal quarters with 100+ other passengers, make sure you’ve showered, taken your activated charcoal (natural way to reduce gas) and not over sprayed the perfume/cologne. When I was young, I flew alone as an unaccompanied minor, constantly. My …

Bartender Rants: The most annoying pickup line I get

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Bartending at a nightclub on the weekends, every shift without fail I get ear fed with close to 100 pick up lines. All lame, some more inappropriate than others. A few recent examples are “ You look like a porn star, I love porn stars” (I was wearing a long sleeve top and jeans with my Js and he wasn’t talking about Porn Star shooters) “You a bad girl? You look like a bad girl with all those tattoos” ( 1 of 50 other tattoo related pickups) “Is that real?!!!” (In reference to my behind and usually my breasts as well) “I’ll get a glass of water, and your number” Me “ what can I get for you” Him “ what would I call a taste of you” “What are you doing after work?”-“Sleeping”-“Sleeping with me?” These are only a few of many, I deal with plenty of drunk dumb dumbs all night and it really doesn’t phase me, sometimes it makes me laugh. Most of the time I just pretend I don’t hear it …